My Manager Hasn't Given Me a Hike in 3 Years, But I Still Feel Lucky to Have Him

Sometimes I genuinely feel lucky to have the manager I currently have. And the funny thing is, if I list down his qualities, many of you might wonder why I feel lucky at all.

Every time I scroll through LinkedIn, Reddit, or other workplace discussions, I come across stories about terrible managers. Managers who reject leaves, expect employees to work on weekends, take credit for others' work, deny promotions, micromanage everything, or make people's lives miserable.

And then I look at my own manager. Does he have some of these qualities? Absolutely. Has he given me a good hike every year? No. Has he promoted me recently? Not at all.

In fact, it's been almost three years since I received a hike or promotion. Every appraisal cycle, I hear almost the same feedback.

"You are doing good work, but I expect more from you." "You are a dedicated employee, but you need to develop leadership skills." "You need to start thinking beyond your assigned responsibilities."

Sometimes I genuinely feel stuck in my current role and in this organization. I see people around me progressing in their careers, switching companies, getting better packages, and moving into leadership positions.

Meanwhile, I'm still trying to figure out what those missing leadership skills are.

But despite all this, there are moments when I genuinely appreciate having him as my manager.

That One Production Issue I Still Remember

There was this one incident that completely changed how I looked at him. We had a critical production deployment with a strict deadline. Things didn't go as planned, and something broke badly during deployment.

It was already late at night, and we were struggling to fix the issue. By around 2 AM, I was completely exhausted. I had been staring at logs, debugging code, trying different fixes, and nothing seemed to work.

I reached a point where I couldn't even think logically about simple things. My brain had practically stopped working.

And my manager was still there. He didn't just sit on the call asking for updates every ten minutes. He actually started debugging with me, checking configurations, reviewing the changes, and trying to figure out what went wrong.

At one point, he practically took over because I was no longer in a position to think clearly. We continued working until around 3 AM, and finally, we managed to resolve the issue and complete the deployment.I still remember that night.

Not because we fixed a production issue. We have fixed plenty of those. But because when things went wrong, my manager didn't leave me alone to deal with the mess.

He could have simply escalated the issue, blamed me for the delay, or asked me to stay online until everything was fixed.

Instead, he stayed and worked alongside me. And I think that deserves some appreciation.

He Doesn't Expect My Weekends

Another thing I appreciate is that he generally respects weekends. I have heard so many stories of managers expecting people to be available on Saturdays, Sundays, and even during vacations. Thankfully, that hasn't been my regular experience.

There are stressful weekdays, production issues, and occasional late-night calls, but he doesn't casually expect me to sacrifice my weekends. Maybe this should be a basic expectation from every manager rather than something worth appreciating.

But looking at the current corporate culture, sometimes even basic things start feeling like privileges.

Leave Approvals Come With a Warning

When it comes to leaves, I honestly don't remember the last time he cancelled or rejected one of my leave requests. If I need time off, I generally get it. Of course, that doesn't mean he approves everything with a smile.Sometimes he says things like:

"You are taking too many leaves these days." Or: "Plan your leaves properly. We have deliverables coming up."

I usually listen, smile, and move on.

Because at the end of the day, my leave still gets approved. Would I prefer not hearing those comments?

Definitely. But I also know people who have to justify taking a single day off, even when they have enough leave balance.

So comparatively, I feel fortunate.

He Encourages Opinions, But He Also Loses His Temper

One thing I genuinely like is that he encourages me to share my viewpoints during technical discussions.

He doesn't always agree with me, but he gives me opportunities to explain my approach, question decisions, and suggest alternatives. Sometimes we have healthy disagreements, and that's fine.

But there is another side to him. When deliverables are delayed or things don't go according to plan, he can become quite harsh.

There have been instances where he has spoken unprofessionally, and I didn't like the way he handled the situation.

I tell myself that deadlines create pressure and people sometimes lose their temper. But thinking about it now, maybe that's something I shouldn't normalize either.

Work pressure might explain someone's frustration, but it doesn't necessarily justify how they speak to others.

The Strange Part About My Situation

This is where I feel conflicted. On one hand, I genuinely believe my manager is a decent person to work with.

He helps when things go wrong. He doesn't unnecessarily interfere in every small task. He gives me space to work independently. And when I'm stuck with something, even if it's a silly mistake, he sometimes sits with me and helps figure it out.

On the other hand, my career growth has practically stopped. Three years without a hike or promotion is not a small thing. Appreciation during difficult times is important, but so is recognition for consistent contributions.

Sometimes I wonder whether I'm confusing a supportive manager with a good manager.

Because being available during a production crisis is one aspect of leadership. Helping employees grow, recognizing their contributions, giving actionable feedback, and advocating for their careers are equally important.

Have We Lowered Our Expectations From Managers?

This is another thought that keeps coming back to me. Maybe I've heard so many terrible manager stories that I've started appreciating things that should actually be normal.

A manager approving leaves shouldn't be extraordinary. A manager not forcing weekend work shouldn't be extraordinary. A manager helping during a production issue shouldn't be extraordinary.

These should ideally be basic qualities of someone managing a team. But when the internet is filled with stories of toxic workplaces, even a reasonably supportive manager starts looking exceptional.

And maybe that's exactly what's happening with me.

So, Is He a Good Manager or Not?

I don't have a straightforward answer. If you ask me whether I'm happy with my career progression under him, the answer is no.

If you ask me whether I feel comfortable approaching him when something goes wrong, the answer is yes.

If you ask me whether I would like to continue working with him, I would probably say yes, but not at the cost of remaining stuck in the same role forever. Maybe that's the reality of corporate life.

For now, I still feel lucky to have him compared to many of the experiences I hear about.

But I'm also beginning to realize that being comfortable in a team and growing in your career are two very different things.

And eventually, I might have to choose between them.

I'm curious what others think. Would you prefer a supportive manager who doesn't help much with your career growth, or a demanding manager who pushes you hard but rewards you with better hikes and promotions?